This Christmas we didn't visit my family and we didn't visit Marissa's.  It looked like we were going to have a quiet, somewhat sad little holiday - not that Christmas is a Big Deal, but we almost always spend it with some family.  However, things didn't turn out too bad - thanks to our friend Gloria and her big ol' family.

So Gloria is a woman that Marissa has become friends with at work.  She is funny and smart, and befriended Marissa right off the bat.  They are just kooky enough to get along with each other, I think.  Gloria has four very cute children.  She is expecting her fifth.

In addition to making cute (and well behaved) children, Gloria makes the most unbelievable cakes.  She is a professional  - making more money baking cakes for weddings and church parties than she does as a full time phlebotomist.  Fantastic cakes.

The bummer about all of this is that Gloria's fifth child is being a problem, and she has been ordered on bed-rest, seriously limiting her ability to work and bake fabulous cakes and take care of x-mas shopping.  The positive is that this gave us a chance to play Santa to her kids, which was fun.  I had more fun choosing the right Baby Bratz than I bet her girls will playing with them (those Baby Bratz are foxy with a capital F-O-X-Y, let me tell you).

So Gloria learns that we are going to be staying in Middle Tennessee for Christmas, with no direct contact with our immediate families, as dysfunctional as they may be, and invites us to spend family with her, her parents, and her extended family.

Me, I am thinking "Hallelujah, I am going to experience Christmas with a Southern, African-American family but Oh-Jesus-I-will-be-the-only-white-guy-there" - it is both exciting and scary at the same time.  Gloria is really cool with me - she knows people are individually good or not regardless of their race.  But I don't know about the rest of her family.  Any one of them could have had an experience that taught them  "no-matter what, whatever the white man tells you it is a lie".  So I am going in with one certainty  - I am not to be trusted.  Hell, I  don't trust myself, so the last thing I need is a room full of people conditioned to mistrust someone who looks like me waiting for me to ruin their party.

My worry was a waste, because Bert and Edwina - Gloria's parents - made sure that Marissa and I felt like part of the family as soon as we walked in.  We were introduced all around.  We were told to make ourselves comfortable.  When Marissa asked to help out in the kitchen (something that really comforts her) she was told what to do. When I just sat there and ate I was offered more food.

Meanwhile, their house filled up with people.  It was noisy, chaotic and good spirited - just like being at home.  And of course there was gossip - "nobody has talked to so-and-so for 15 years though now I forget why" kind of talk.  It was great.

And we had food - smoked brisket, chicken wings, spaghetti and meatballs.  And of course Gloria, though she was supposed to be bedresting, made five different desserts:

1. The Best Coconut Cake Ever

2. Caramel Cake

3. Coca-Cola Cake

4. Pound Cake good enough for the Baby Jesus

5. Peach Cobbler

I ate so much I could only sit in the corner, laughing at jokes while secretly praying I didn't fart. There is nothing like Christmas with family.